As Angels cry
by Sarahloulabellx
Summary: It was the final straw somethig snapped and now she's stuck in a downward spiral left alone at her most vunerable. She needs someone to catch her and quickly but first they have to find her.
1. Chapter 1

_Hey so I am currently in love with new tricks and thought I would try writting a fanfic out I'm not sure where this is going or how long it is going to be. I hope you enjoy this!_

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'I really thought I found something new!' she shouted as she finally let her defences fall.

'It's not what it looks like Sandra really it's not' he called after her.

'Everyone around me thought I was going crazy, they even came right out and told me so. They said you had a past, but I defended you made excuse after goddam excuse for you and this is how you repay me'

The tears were begging to make an appearance but she would not let him see, she would not give him the satisfaction.

'Please, Sandra I've been an idiot'

She scoffed she couldn't find the energy to shout and scream anymore picking up her coat and bag she went to walk out of the room but a hand caught her wrist pulling her back.

'Please don't go' he begged.

'You are lucky you can still walk' she muttered before pulling her hand away and proceeding to walk out of the house.

She wasn't really sure where she was she had been walking around London for what felt like minutes but in reality it had been hours.

The sun was beginning to come up when she finally realised she was cold but she still didn't put her coat on, the black strapless cocktail dress she was wearing offered next to no warmth but she was beginning to not notice again and her jacket lay limp in her hand.

She continued to walk the more she walked the more her brain had to work to keep up with her and right now she didn't want to think.

But she was not granted that luxury; the image of him and his bit on the side replaying itself over and over again as if someone had pressed replay, she felt sick and it wasn't the fact he had cheated on her it was the fact he had been the first one to break the barriers of a relationship with Sandra Pullman.

For almost two years she would ring him at work, she had met his family and he had even met hers, she felt dirty every time she had broken down shown him her vulnerable side he had proceeded to comfort her. Then run off to his other bit.

It was a vicious circle she had already learned that the hard way but this time her circle was cracked there was a big blue cross through that circle that made this hurt on a whole new level.

…

'Mornin' Gerry called as he walked into the UCOS office that morning.

'Morning' Brian and Jack both replied almost in perfect unison.

'Where's Sandra?' he asked expecting the usual rant about being late.

'No idea' replied Jack.

'Weird'

'I know but she's probably in a meeting with Strickland somewhere' reasoned Brian.

'Rather her than me' laughed Gerry in response.

The boys were all getting worked up now it had been almost two hours since they had gotten into the office and there was still no sign of Sandra.

'This is ridiculous what are we meant to be doing'

'Well Gerry there is this thing…' Jack began before Gerry put a hand up.

'If you say paperwork I swear I'm going to the pub'

'Sorry Gerry what was that?' A new voice asked making Gerry jump and cringe before turning to face his boss' boss.

'Ah, sir erm that? Just having a laugh with Jack here' he spluttered it wasn't that the man made him nervous, no he just couldn't stand another lecture on appropriate work place behaviour he'd had enough of them from Sandra without Strickland adding.

Ignoring the older man Strickland walked towards Sandra's office 'Where's Detective Pullman?'

'We thought she was with you sir?' replied Jack honestly making Brian look up at the scene for the first time since Gerry had threatened to leave.

'No we were meant to be having a meeting at 9 but she didn't turn up hence my appearance down here' explained the man clearly confused.

'I'll ring 'er' added Gerry sitting back down at his desk.

'She's not answering already tried that Gerry'

Now all four of them stopped what they were doing.

'Sir?! I think we have a problem' spluttered Jack.

'I agree there is something very wrong here'

'What do we do?' asked Brian clearly getting worked up.

'Gerry, come on me and you are going to her flat' Strickland finally ordered.

Gerry didn't even argue he was way too worried to complain about being stuck with his superior.

'Sir all due respect but what about us two?' asked Jack before the DAC could leave the room.

'Stay here if she turns up ring one of us' he explained pausing at the door 'There could be a reasonable explanation for all this'

'I bludy well hope so' whispered Gerry.

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Thanks for reading :) I'm not to sure though when the next chapter will be as I have a lot on at 6th form but I will get it up ASAP xx


	2. Chapter 2

_Hey just wanted to say a massive thank you to everyone who has taken the time to review, favourite, follow and even just read this it means a great deal to hear from you! :)_

_I hope you all enjoy this new chapter I will try to get updates up asap but I have a ridiculos work load at the moment including 5 essays to do tomorrow so I apologise in advance if there are long waits between updates. _

_sarah-lou xx_

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'SANDRA ARE YOU IN THERE?' called Gerry through the small letter box as Strickland tried to peer through the small bay window.

'I can't see anything Gerry'

'What do we do now then sir?' asked Gerry standing up and smoothing the creeks out of his back as he did so.

'Well I don't know about you but I am personally worried for the safety of the person inside' he stated quiet professionally making Gerry smirk and think of Sandra and her attempts to stick to the rules.

'I agree sir'

That was all Strickland needed as he picked a rock from the small garden and smashed one of the small panes of glass in the door thanking god Sandra had a latch lock.

Gerry was shocked this was a side of Strickland he hadn't seen before all action, he was actually impressed.

As soon as the two men gained access they began a quick search of the house, room by room until they came to her bedroom. Gerry felt slightly guilty and embarrassed about barging into his boss' bedroom but he was to worried about her sudden disappearance to be stopped.

Bursting through the door Gerry was about to apologise profusely as he was greeted by the sight of two bodies in her bed, but he was stopped when he spotted the female wasn't the one he was looking for.

'What the hell do you think you're doing?' Shouted the man jumping up from the bed.

'I should be asking you exactly the same thing!' Gerry spat back.

The shouting had alerted Strickland who quickly joined Gerry.

'Where's Sandra?' he asked ignoring the stare off the two men were currently having.

'How should I know' he snapped not looking away from Gerry.

'Oh I don't know maybe because you live with her' Gerry retorted.

'Pfft doubt it now' he sniggered.

'What the hell does that mean?' Gerry grew even angrier stepping closer.

'It means the stupid bitch came home early yesterday spoiled my fun' the man explained smirking back at the women in his bed.

'You…'

'Gerry! This can wait'

'I swear if anything has happened to her'

'You'll what granddad?'

'I'll make sure you never have any fun again'

'Yeah? You and what army?' sniggered the man.

'Him and the rest of the metropolitan police force' explained Strickland turning and walking away from the scene and motioning for Gerry to follow who did after one more stand-off with the man.

As soon as the two got back in Strickland's car, the younger man turned to Gerry 'we are going to find Sandra scrap whatever case you have we can solve that later'

…..

Every morning for the past 6 years Arthur Malley followed the same routine, get up, get dressed, have breakfast go to the local garage and pick a new bunch of flowers then visit his wife.

Usually there were a couple of people dotted about the cemetery each taking their times to see the people they loved.

The one thing Arthur really liked about this place was the unity it brought out in people, everyone would say hello as you walked past, some would even go so far as to make polite conversation about the weather or the beauty of the area they were stood in. This was something Arthur missed in the world outside these wrought iron gates.

Approaching the eroding headstone Arthur bent down placing his hand on the top 'morning love' he smiled.

'I've brought you some lily's today, yes they were on offer' he laughed imagining every small detail of his wife as if she was stood in front of him.

He stayed like that for at least an hour having a one sided conversation but savouring every last second.

As he got up to leave saying his goodbyes he noticed someone new sat on a bench nearby, he could tell the poor women was upset beyond measure she was shaking and not just because she was wearing a pretty skimpy dress on a cold November morning.

'Hello love' he approached her hoping he could help the poor women.

She didn't say anything but looked up at him with tear filled eyes.

'It's a bit nippy out here today' he commented as he sat next to her.

She kept looking at him not saying a word it was as if she was assessing every last detail of him.

'I'm Arthur by the way' he tried.

She nodded in response.

The old man could feel he wasn't going to get any answers out of the women.

'Trust me pet It hurts every day, losing someone you love but the important thing is you don't hide the pain you keep it close and controlled it is a reminder of all the good and even some of the bad. Most importantly it's a reminder of that one person who will and does stay with you even if sometimes you feel so alone like the world has disappeared and left you all by yourself. Just don't let it eat you up and make you lose who you are.'

Arthur stood placing his hand on the women's shoulder he smiled slightly and went to walk away before a small quiet voice stopped him.

'I'm Sandra' she whispered before getting up herself and walking in the opposite direction.

Arthur stood watching her retreating figure 'Good luck Sandra' he smiled hoping he had made his Jean proud.


	3. Chapter 3

_Heyy everyone, sorry for the long gap between updates its been a bit crazy for me but here you are a new chapter. _

_Thank you to everyone that reviewed, favourited and followed this it means a lot to here what you all think. _

_Hope you enjoy this new chapter..._

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It had now been around 48 hours since Sandra had last been seen the boys were all worried sick but they had managed to remain in control enough to order themselves into an investigation.

Strickland had arranged the others so at all times someone was in the office and someone else was at her home, they had unceremoniously kicked her ex out so if she returned there she wouldn't have to deal with that.

He had even managed to persuade the commissioner to help out making sure most uniform new about Sandra's disappearance and circuiting her description around the MET.

No one knew what to do, there was no real evidence of her being kidnapped or anything along that nature but this was so out of character for Sandra they weren't ruling anything out right now.

As Brian, Gerry and Strickland all gathered around the case board in the UCOS office they each tried to avoid the photo of Sandra stuck in the middle.

'So what have we got so far?' Strickland asked looking at both men in anticipation.

'I've been looking at her credit and debit card records as well as her mobile records and I can't find anything that shows activity in the past few days. No big amounts going out that could signal she has gone somewhere and nothing that even indicates her phone is turned on' Brian explained sounding quite detached but the others knew that was how he was staying in control, he had to keep treating this like it was any other missing person otherwise he would lose it all together.

Gerry remembered the phone call he had received from Esther; she was in hysterics after finding Brian at their kitchen table staring intently into a bottle of whiskey. He had immediately driven straight round with Jack and they both talked him down from that invisible edge but since then he hadn't been his usual self, none of them had.

'I've been chasing CCTV but I can't find any sign of Sandra, but I've also been liaising with uniform and they have been circling her description to neighbours local shops, pubs etc nothing yet sir' Gerry went on to explain.

'I've been speaking to the commissioner he wants us to meet with a negotiator and to use that to put together a press conference he thinks if we are dealing with kidnappers it could bring them out the wood work' Strickland's tone left no room for arguments.

'All due respect sir I really don't think we are dealing with abduction here, I mean what would be the first thing you would do after kidnapping a MET detective especially one as well-known as Sandra?'

'Make a ransom demand' answered Brian with a deep sigh.

'Exactly and well we've had nothing, the commissioners had nothing and even Sandra's mother's hasn't had anything' Gerry was exasperated he was getting more and more annoyed as every lead led to a brick wall and they always seemed stuck.

'I know Gerry but right now we need to look at every possibility' Strickland was interrupted by the ringing of his phone 'it's the commissioner I'll be right back' he explained before leaving the room.

Both men watched their boss as he answered his mobile and began pacing back and forth.

After a couple of minutes he hung up, they both couldn't help but notice as he didn't move immediately but instead leant against the nearest wall and stared at the phone in his hand, neither man could hold back the feeling of dread that occurred in those small minutes.

As their boss made his way back into the office that feeling of dread intensified in both men as they noticed how the colour had drained completely from the man and they both noticed how he couldn't meet either of them in the eyes.

'Someone needs to get Jack here now' he ordered.

'Sir, what's going on?' Gerry had to know.

'Just get Jack here Gerry'

'Damm it Strickland tell us what the hell is going on here' he was beyond frightened now he had never seen his boss acting so bizarre he knew nothing good could come of this.

'I swear to God Gerry for once in your life just dam well do as I ask!'

This sudden outburst stunned both men they all remained silent just staring at each other in silent question.

It was Brian that broke the silence moving towards his desk 'I'll ring Jack' he explained.

Strickland nodded in response then turned to Gerry 'Sandra's office now' leading the other man into the all too familiar room.

'I've just received some news from the commissioner that could change everything' he explained.

'Sir please what the hell's going on'

'A couple of hours ago a body was retrieved from a lake near the willow hill Cemetery, It looks like it's been there for the past 24hours.' He explained his voice wavering slightly.

Gerry sank into the seat 'Oh god is it?'

Strickland shook his head 'they are performing DNA and dental analysis, the bacteria in the water has erased any chance of a visual ID, but they did find speak to an elderly man who said he met someone yesterday matching Sandra's description'

'When will we know?'

'The commissioner is getting it pushed to the top of the pile we show know by the end of today'

'I feel sick, I can't…No it won't be Sandra'

'Gerry we can't know that we have to prepare ourselves just in case'

They both knew these next couple of hours or maybe even days were going to be the longest and hardest either of them had ever faced.


	4. Chapter 4

_Hey guys sorry for leaving you so long with such an awful cliffhanger but here you go the answer to all your questions dun dun dunnnnn haha. _

_Enjoy!_

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Gerry sat staring off into space her was still in Sandra's office and hadn't moved for hours he couldn't move if he stayed here he could pretend he was waiting for her to bollock him for something and right now he would give anything for that.

Strickland had told the others what was going on he had heard Jacks refusal to believe what he was being told.

Now they were all waiting it was all they could do.

Robert Strickland didn't class himself as a religious man, infact he had openly dismissed any sort of belief but right now he found himself questioning everything even his beliefs.

Stuck in his own world it took him a couple of seconds longer than it should have to realise his phone was ringing, hesitantly and with shaking hands he answered.

'Strickland?' It came out as more of a question than a statement.

'Yes sir, Okay I'll tell them. Yes thank you Sir' It was brief but there didn't seem anything else could be said.

Gerry looked up as the door to the office opened jumping out of Sandra's seat forgetting everything momentarily and believing this would be the women in question who would proceed to shout at him for being in her seat.

However he quickly remembered everything as he saw his boss' boss walk further into the room.

'I don't want to know' Brian whispered to Jack who nodded his head in agreement.

'I know but this is something we have to face' Jack replied as he watched Gerry stumble into the room.

'I've been on the phone with the commissioner he has the results of the DNA' Strickland began before Gerry cut in.

'Just tell us'

'Its not Sandra'

There was an elective sigh of relief which echoed around the room.

'That's great but leaves us with a problem' Jack admitted.

'Yeah, where the hell is she'

'Why didn't we think of this before' Brian shouted making the other three men jump.

'What?'

'Where did you say the man had seen Sandra?' Brian asked.

'Willow Hill cemetery why?'

'A cemetery why would Sandra go to a cemetery?' His eyes shining with excitement.

'She's turned into an Emo?' Gerry snapped he hated when Brian made them come to their own realisation.

'Her father' Jack interrupted before Brian could snap back at Gerry.

'Exactly look at it this way the one person she looked up to, treasured, loved the most kills himself, but she learns to live with it. Her whole life this has been happening the people she loved the most have let her down, betrayed her or left. She learned to protect herself the first time, what happens though when she lets those barriers down to someone special and they go and do just what everyone else has done.'

Brian's explanation made each man wince at their naivety how could they miss this?

'How does this help us find her?' Gerry was the one to ask what the others were thinking.

'We look to where she feels safe where she doesn't have to hide herself away'

'I have an idea' Jack stated after a couple of minutes.

'After Sandra's father died Grace moved out of their family home, a couple of weeks later I came home after work one day to find Mary in the kitchen with a crying Sandra, she'd tried to run away back to her old home'

He went on to explain how Sandra felt close to her father in their old home and how she begged them not to take her back to her new house.

'Would she have gone there? After all these years I mean?' Strickland was beginning to think he didn't know Sandra Pullman at all.

'It doesn't matter how many years may pass family still remains the most important thing to a person'

The men were all shocked by tough guy Gerry's explanation but they knew this was not the time to wind him up.

'I think we need to go visit Sandra's childhood' Brian instructed getting up to grab his coat and scarf.

Leading the way as everyone else followed.


End file.
